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Q: What do you call a Ford project car?
A: Keeping it running.

Q: Why did Ford put heaters in the bumpers of their new trucks?
A: So the owners can keep their hands warm while pushing them home.

Q: Why are the new Ford trucks more aerodynamic?
A: So they save us gas when the Chevy tows them away.

Q: What did the Chevy say to the Ford?
A: Would you like a tow home?

Q: How can they approve the new Ford truck?
A: Put a Chevy engine in it.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?.
A: To push his Ford F-150 back into the shop.

Q: Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
A: Because his F-150 got stuck.

Q: Why are the Ford dealers giving away a free German Shepherd with every car sold?
A: So the owner has someone to walk home with.

Q: Why do the new F-150's have larger bumpers?
A: It makes it easier on the tow trucks.

A man pulled up next to a little girl walking home from school and said, "If you get in, I'll give you a lollypop." The girl kept walking. The man then said, "Come on, get in the car with me and I'll give you two lollypops." The girl kept her eyes on the sidewalk and continued on her way. The man said "Get in with me and I'll give you a whole bag of lollypops!" Finally the girl turned and said, "Look daddy, YOU bought the Ford, YOU ride in it!!!"

A Texan was bragging to a young man about how much money he had, how many great adventures he'd had, and how much land he owned. The man, growing tired of all the big talk, finally asked the Texan, "Just how much land do you actually own?" The Texan tipped back his cowboy hat and said to the young man, "Well sonny, let me put it to ya' like this, I can get in my pickup at sunrise, drive all day long, skip lunch and still not get to the other side of my property by sundown." The young man shot back quickly, "Oh yeah, I know what you mean, I used to own a Ford truck too!"

  • Ford Explorer = Ford Exploder.
  • Have you outdriven a Ford lately?
  • Have you driven over a Ford lately?
  • Ford Escort (me to your local Chevy dealer)
  • I could never keep a Ford under me... I was always under the Ford!
  • "From the past 10 years, 90% of all Ford trucks are still on the road." The other 10% made it home.
  • If Ford means First On Race Day, it's only because they're just now getting to the finish line from the last race day.
  • Why are there sidewalks next to most streets? So Ford owners have a safe place to walk home.
  • Support your local mechanic; buy a Ford

What does FORD stand for? Here are a few suggestions.

  • Found On Roadside Dead
  • Factory Ordered Road Disasters
  • Flip Over, Read Directions
  • Four Old Rusty Doors
  • For Only Retarded Drivers
  • Flipped Over Russian Dunebuggy
  • Found On Railroad Deserted
  • Fix or Repair Daily

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